In my last post, I began the telling of how I saw God move on my behalf as I readied for a trip to Nashville, Here is Part 2 of 4. 

When I arrived at the modest hotel in Dallas the hour was early which gave me ample time to rest, shower, and eat a nice dinner. I even squeezed a good, solid workout in. As I readied for bed with a bit more clarity I decided to look into returning home Sunday instead of Saturday for two reasons.

One, I had been able to notify the hotel in Nashville to keep the remaining nights but they were not sure I could get a refund for canceling two hours prior to checking in. In turn, I might lose the money I had prepaid since it was booked through a third party.

Two, I wanted to make up for the day I had lost in Nashville so as not to waste such an expensive flight only to return home so quickly. 

I put out a plea to the Lord and asked for guidance to make the right decision. I decided to start with the hotel. I dialed the hotel and a sweet gal with a lovely southern drawl answered the phone. I explained to her my dilemma and that I wished to use the credit from tonight’s stay and conclude my visit on Sunday instead of Saturday, while she completely agreed with my logic she said, “Because you scheduled through another party I will have to see if the system will let me but I will give it a go.” After a few seconds, she excitedly exclaimed, “It worked! You are set to stay here Thursday thru Saturday. We will see you soon.” I hung up relieved that step one was complete. I then reached out to the ticketing agent in hopes that I could change my Saturday return flight allowing me to arrive home on Sunday. The agent warned me that this request would most likely cost around $200 but she would take a look at what was available and get back to me. Almost 30 minutes later she came back online and said, “I have a 6:00 am flight from Nashville to Minneapolis, then from Minneapolis to San Diego with a $50 change fee. Do you want it?” I couldn’t believe it! I replied, “Yes please!” and thanked Jesus for taking care of this desire to make the most of my trip. I reached out to everyone involved back home to let them know I was not going to return in time for Sunday service. 

On Thursday I arrived in Nashville with ample time to get checked in and ready for the conference. The next two days were a bit of a whirlwind filled with the excitement of meeting new people, hearing incredible music, and getting updated information from vendors. The conference opened that evening with my absolute favorite worship artist, Brooke Ligertwood. She was everything I could hope for; gracious, humble, and talented, and she beautifully led over 800 people in song with such brevity that allowed an outpouring of the Holy Spirit.

That same night, Lisa Harper, a well-known author, and pastor shared Paul’s teaching on Ephesians. She shared that we are to approach the throne of God with “confidence and humility,” reminding us what a fine line that is to balance. Those words, “confidence and humility” resonated in my heart the rest of the night and I asked God to open my eyes and heart to what the weekend held for me.

“confidence and humility“

Each service cracked open new truths about me; a follower of Jesus, a worship leader, a mother, a wife, and a friend. On the second day of the conference, Pastor Chris Brooks from Local Church in Nashville continued with the theme of humility and dropped the weighty nugget, “Humility is tied to our authority,” and asked if we were ready to “receive the full weight of the calling and character on our lives?” He then leaned in and asked a final question which he drew from the book of Matthew in the story of when Jesus asked the two blind beggars outside the temple walls before he healed their sight, “What do you want me to do for you?” Chris pointed out that it is a comical question if you think about it. One might answer, “Um, Jesus, obvi, they want their sight healed.” Pastor Chris guided us to sit with that question as if Jesus were in front of us right then? I envisioned Jesus sitting in front of me asking me,

“Kelly, what do you want me to do for you?” In my heart, I said, “To see people.” 

Pastor Chris chided us a bit that we would knee jerk to a liturgical answer but to be honest and again the words came to my mind, “To see people, to really see people.” I attribute it to the fact that just a few days before my trip I had been invited to read a new book called, Good, and Beautiful and Kind by Rich Villodas as part of a book launch. I was honored to read a book before it is released to the public, which comes out this July, and give feedback in a social media group forum. As I read this gorgeous book I was encouraged with tangible ways to be good, beautiful, and kind. While reading it the image of a homeless man on my street corner right outside our local grocery store kept flashing in my mind’s eye. I ‘saw’ him every time I went to the store with my husband and I always had my canned answer, “I’m sorry, I don’t have any cash.” That was always true, but had I thought to sit by him and ask, “What can I do for you?” I was feeling the rawness of this conviction even now as Pastor Chris spoke. 

After two and a half days of rich learning, I returned to the venue on the final morning of the conference a bit exhausted since the night before ended well past 10:30 pm. As the morning kicked off a group of about twenty vocalists and musicians came out with incredible energy, clothed in bright colors and each member representing a range of diversity in age, ethnicity, and talent. They called themselves Sanctuary and the joy they exuded spilled from the stage and washed over us. We sang for over an hour followed by a sermon shared by Pastor Ty, whose last name I missed because I had to slip out to use the restroom. Pastor Ty sounded and looked like Chris Rock except for the large beard that grazed his chest. He was a lean, tall man with a ton of energy. He paced the stage and quoted scripture with authority and humor that had us all on the edge of our seats. Pastor Ty wrecked me that morning when he stated,

“The enemy speaks to pain but God wants to heal it.” 

He had been pacing the stage nonstop when he stopped and said, “The word ‘forgiveness’ is coming to my mind. I’m gonna stop right here.” His eyes got real big and he smiled and said, “Oh boy, who here needs to hear this word??” He bounced up and down a bit and got really excited as the Holy Spirit began to move and asked with enthusiasm and passion, “Who here needs to hear the word of forgiveness? What do you need to forgive and renounce? What lies of the enemy are you believing today. What thing is haunting you today?” When he said the word “haunting” I dropped to my seat and grabbed my notepad and pen and began to write the words that flowed out of my head and heart of the lies I was believing and holding onto, the choices of my past that haunt me all these years later, and the revelation and surprise that I needed to forgive someone in my life for past hurts.

Pastor Ty broke into song, singing, “I’m no longer a slave to fear. I am a child of God.” As he sang, the group Sanctuary joined him followed by the congregation and the sound of the proclamation was almost deafening. I stood and sang and wept and lifted words of praise until there was nothing left. Another pastor came out to offer us all a benediction as we parted our separate ways. I was filled to the brim with gratitude and began to make my way back to my hotel a little unsure how I would process all that I had received.

If you missed part 1 you can check it out here https://lifeonthebackburner.wordpress.com/