I would like to share a story with you. It’s a story I love to share, but do not always get the opportunity. You can believe it, disbelieve it, discard it, or let it speak to you. As you read it, know this; it is my story that I know to have truly happened and I believe that others can experience the same truth and reality.

When I was a teenager and upon getting my first job my dad sat me down with a roll of Lifesavers and said, “Kelly, as you embark on becoming a working girl you need to know the responsibility that comes with it. God has given you this job and the means to earn the money that will be coming to you. He asks that we give 10% of what we have back to Him.” Then my dad proceeded to give me ten Lifesavers and took one of them away saying, “God does not ask for much. You get to keep nine of the Lifesavers, but he asks you give him this one” I remember thinking, as most 15 1/2 year olds would, “Yeah, yeah. Good to know.” From that moment on my dad spoke to me every now and then of the miracles he experienced when he “gave in faith” back to God. He said that numerous times when he and my mom didn’t have the money in the bank to write their tithe check, they did anyway. Over and over God proved faithful and the amount was covered. They were always logical and practical ways for the money to come in. Sometimes it was an over-pay refund from an insurance company, the IRS or an anonymous gift to them from a parishioner of my parent’s church. It was not a common practice for my parents to “test” God in any way shape or form. I am not recommending people go around writing fraudulent checks hoping God will bail them out. My dad was and is always trying to convey to me that God will take care of me if I put him first.

Somewhere along the way as I became an adult the message I heard got a little skewed. I had this small fear in the back of my mind that if I didn’t tithe, something bad would happen to me. I honestly don’t know where that lie stemmed from, but by the time I got married at 21, it was a pretty big fear. My husband and I both grew up in the church, but he has always pushed and questioned Christianity. At first it scared the living daylights out of me. I would ask him all the time, “Are you sure you have Jesus in your heart?” It’s funny to us now, but at the time I didn’t know how to deal with it. As we settled into married life and began to figure out whose role was whose, the topic of tithing came up. I tried to explain to him why it was so important but all I could say was, “We have to tithe. We just have to.” I’ve never been good at pleading an argument and I had no reasoning behind it anymore, except for “we have to or God will be angry.” He told me that we weren’t going to tithe until I could tithe out of reverence and not out of irrational fear. It was a weird time for me as a Christian. Here I was newly married and the only pastor I had known was my father. Now I was having to do life, marriage and faith on my own. It was a topic of frustration for quite a few months. After a while though, I let it go and allowed it to settle onto the back burner of my life. Every now and then the thought creeped back in but I did not want to deal with the topic.

6 years later my husband and I were now parents to 3 beautiful children living in a 2 bedroom apartment. At the time they were 4, 3 and 1 years old. We were blessed with 3 children but we will admit our youngest was completely unexpected and unplanned. We were young, broke and making painful sacrifices to live on one income so I could be at home with those beautiful children. We were heavily involved in an awesome startup church. I was singing in the worship band, running the Women’s ministry, and leading a bible study. Jon was running sound, involved with the men’s ministry and we helped setup almost every Sunday, but we didn’t tithe. During that time I read a series by Francine Rivers called A Lineage of Grace. It is the story of 5 women of the bible who were in Christ’s lineage. It’s an amazing series. As I was reading the story of Ruth, the part about Ruth’s father-in-law stuck out to me. In River’s depiction of Ruth’s father-in-law; he would not allow the poor to glean from his fields. It was custom in that time, a way of tithing, to allow the poor and widowed to follow behind the harvesters and pick up the wheat that would fall. It was a beautiful cultural cycle that God put in place among the Israelite’s that allowed those unfortunate not to starve and yet have dignity. Ruth’s father-in-law, Elimelech, did not allow people to do this. God was angry at him for it and caused him to get sick and die. (That is probably where the fear idea for me came from. lol) This in turn began Ruth’s journey to Bethlehem and how she married Boaz causing her to become a part of Christ’s lineage. It’s an amazing story when you have the time.

Now, back to my humble story. Here I was a 26 year old mom and I felt like I was reading this story for the first time, or truly hearing it. I went to the bible and read the story of Ruth for myself and instead of seeing God as really harsh, I saw it as him wanting me to know that this was how God was. This was the God of the Old Testament. Now, because of Jesus, we have a new relationship with God. I know, this may seem so contradictory, but stick with me. After I read this book, I shared with Jon how I was feeling. I told him I really felt we needed to start tithing. I believed God was wanting to show me how to tithe out of love and that the fear factor was not a part of the relationship anymore.

A few days after my husband and I had that conversation an incredible thing occurred. Really late one night, there was a knock at our door. I got out of bed to go and answer it. When I opened the door no one was there. On our door step was an anonymous envelope addressed to us. It had $374 of cash in it. The note read something like, “We are so proud of you and the sacrifices you make for your little family. We felt God telling us to give this amount to you. We love you.” There was a verse included and I believe the verse was Ephesians 5:20 “Always give thanks to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ” Now get this, that dollar amount was the EXACT amount we should have been tithing. Do you get that? The EXACT amount in cash!!! Yeah I know, do the math. We were broke but God showed up in our life and said, “Hey, I want you to trust me that I will provide for you and give to me what is mine.” We started tithing consistently. It was not easy. There were times I wrote that check and I wasn’t sure if we would make it. It was a true step in faith. I remember one time writing the check and having a school loan bill due. My head told me to write the school loan bill, then if we had enough at the end of the pay period, I would write the tithe check. However, my heart, or the Holy Spirit told me to write the tithe check first. I did. I actually mailed both checks. The next day my husband came home with a commission check from a contract position he was doing that was not a consistent gig. I wanted to laugh and cry in relief. 2 years from that season of our life my husband got a raise that was almost double. We were able to buy a home that had 3 bedrooms. Here in Southern California, on one income, that is a feat. I wish I could say we have not faltered since. We have many times been caught up in life, or fear of the future and not tithed. God has not struck us down when we failed, but he does show us favor when we trust Him and put Him first. Sadly, we forget very quickly those moments that He showed up which is why I am writing this down. I never want to forget that when I asked the question, God showed me the answer.

I did a little research on tithing in America. I was happy to find out that according to a 2014 survey by the Giving USA Foundation that 95.4% of Americans give to charity. However, I was sad to discover that the average middle class only gives 3.6% of their income to charity and religious groups. Incomes over $200,000 give 2.6% according to the Nonprofit Almanac. No wonder we are a country that is anemic in philanthropy. If you are not a Christian and have stuck with me this far let me tell you this. Whether you believe in fate, karma or a deity you should try to be diligent in giving. Even from a financial angle, I remember hearing Suze Orman say on Oprah years ago, that it is a great discipline when managing your money to give to a nonprofit organization. Not only is it a tax write off but Dave Ramsey always says, “Tell your money where to go, or the lack of it will always manage you.” When my husband and I don’t tithe, it’s only because we allowed life to get too busy and we stopped managing our money closely. It’s literally the one bill we don’t have to pay.  Tithing or giving 10% of your income helps instill in people a discipline. I guarantee you, many people who don’t tithe have no idea where that money went to. For us it’s quite a chunk now, but if you start when you are making a small amount it becomes habit. Then when you have a lot, it is second nature. Not only that, but it helps make the world go around. If the average giving is 3.6%, what would our world look like if we all gave that extra 6.4%? If 3.6% reflects $174.5 billion dollars given in 2011, can you imagine what over $350 billion could do? I could go on and on. I feel so passionate about not only taking control of your finances, but I strongly believe that tithing or charitable giving is important. I am so grateful that God showed up to my husband and me all those years ago. I wish I knew who it was that dropped that money off (I have an inkling) and could give them a huge hug for listening to God’s prompting. I highly recommend that you seek out in your own life what giving looks like to you. One avenue you can do that is by finding a Dave Ramsey Financial Peace class near you. I hope my story gives you hope wherever you are and that you caught a glimpse of the God I know.

Here are a few charities that I recommend giving to outside of your own church, school or university:

Beauty for Ashes Fund at Point Loma Nazarene University: A scholarship fund established to support the education of survivors of human trafficking, launch many young people into meaningful careers that tackle modern slavery and strengthen the university’s infrastructure to support this level of mentoring.

Preemptive Love Coalition: They offer many lifesaving services but I was drawn to their program for an Irag Crisis Response called Love First. “Preemptive Love is on the ground in Iraq, serving those who suffer and saving lives. With your help, we are uniquely positioned to meet needs of those attacked by ISIS through job creation and lifesaving surgeries.”

New Life Church of the Nazarene in Phelan,CA: Phelan New Life is a church committed to their community and gives the little they have in large ways. It is a church immersed in the drug and poverty stricken community of the High Desert. This church ministers to men who attend Awakening Ranch, a ministry that helps men conquer substance abuse and in some cases once released from prison. They give food to the needy within their community along with feminine products and clothes to a local women shelter affected by substance abuse and poverty.

A great tool to check out reputable charities to give to go to Charities.org