Today Zayn left One Direction. In case you didn’t know, Zayn is going through some crazy life freak out; cheating on his fiance and leaving the On The Road tour a quarter of the way in. I normally wouldn’t know or care, but my 14 year old daughter was quite heartbroken today. Then, my other daughter informed me that girls were cutting themselves and some have died, according to her Instagram feed, for Zayn. This is my letter to those young girls.

Dear sweet girl,

Oh how I wish I could hug you. I don’t know who you are or why you hold so much hope in a young man who does not know what he is doing in life. My 13 year old daughter and I were heartbroken to learn that you thought cutting yourself would ease your pain. If you were my daughter, you would have found out in art class today. You would have had a good cry while some of your classmates scoffed at your emotional outcry. You would climb in my car after school and lament to me how horrible it is that Zayn left while you ate the homemade chocolate chip cookies I happened to make today. I would squeeze your leg as I drove you to your theatre rehearsal and tell you that no matter what it will be ok and Zayn, along with One Direction would survive.  Because sweet girl, it will be ok. Someday you will be in college and laugh at the massive crush you had on Nial and his cute Irish accent and food obsession or you’ll remember how you ooh-ed and aah-ed over Harry’s mop of hair. Liam’s appearance on the X-Factor will be a faint memory and Zayn’s solo’s will linger softly in your mind. Louis’ jokes will always be a fond recollection of your childhood. These boys will be a happy memory to the sound track of your life. I guarantee you though, you will not smile and think fondly of how you curled up in the bathroom and cut your wrist when you heard Zayn left the “On The Road Again Tour.” Maybe you’ll feel saddened to remember your best friend died that night ten years ago as you now try to celebrate your college commencement.

Do you see sweet girl? Do you see he isn’t worth it? Do you see that we’ve all been there? We’ve all been in love with the boy band of our generation. For my mother’s generation it was the Beatles. People cried and screamed, some were trampled to death at concerts just to touch them. For my sister it was New Kids On The Block who some would say paved the way for bands such as One D. For me, it was N’SYNC. I know it feels like the end of the world to you now, but 20 years ago Justin Timberlake left N’SYNC and I thought my life was over. Justin went on to have an incredible career and bring many of us joy even now. I got over my huge crush on JC and married an amazing man who gave me three beautiful children. Never was my life, or your life less important than these men who fill our hearts with songs of love and acceptance. I am begging you, sweet young lady who is finding her solace in One Direction, you need to realize you are worthy of living. You are worthy of life and no man, famous or not, is worth causing yourself harm. Zayn is in a sad dark place and you do not need to be brought down with him.

You are looking for love in the wrong place. You are looking for love in a man, or men who will let you down. They will not always be able to live up to the expectation you have in your sweet mind. The only man I know that has never let me down, is Jesus. I know, you think Jesus is a myth or just a man from history. Maybe you think that Jesus doesn’t know the pain you feel. But guess what, he does. He came to this earth over 2000 years ago to die a brutal death on a cross. A death designed for the lowest of criminals. He was not a criminal, but God in human form who came to show how much he loves you. He loves you so much that he took the punishment for all the awful things you do. The lies you tell, the evil thoughts you think about your parents, the sex you had with the boy you barely knew just because you wanted to feel love and accepted. He died on the cross so that he could know what pain feels like and cover those sins that you and I commit. He gives us hope and peace that when we die, we join him in eternity. It sounds confusing, but without Jesus, death is a sad and scary thing. In Jesus; death, when it’s our time, is a beautiful thing. It is not the end, but the beginning of our eternal existence where there is no pain, no sorrow or mourning. He first wants you to know him, believe in him, love him and LIVE for him. Zayn, nor any other man can give you that much hope. They can make you happy for a moment, or even a few months, but they cannot make you happy day in and day out. No human being can. But Jesus can. He can take those sad, dark thoughts and turn them into thoughts of life and hope. I know you and my daughter are sad that maybe it is an end of an era, but it does not need to be an end to you. I hope you find peace tonight. I will say a prayer for you that you find the peace and joy that I know and that my daughters know. Right now, stop and ask Jesus to fill your heart with a peace that passes all understanding. I pray you find comfort in Him.